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Can I Really Be a Channel?
May 26th, 2010

I recently completed the Yoga Teacher Training course at the Expanding Light. It was an amazing month filled with great joy and laughter, profound wisdom, and personal growth.

Shenoa, Me, Lori and Kelly. Thank you, dear friends, for the joy and the laughter.

Some of my fellow trainees/teachers/friends on a hike to Bald Mountain

The program was an incredible experience. It was a blessing to receive a broader and deeper understanding of yoga in all its aspects. I was blessed to go on this inward journey with a wonderful and inspiring group of people. Even after a week of the program I couldn’t hardly believe that I had only known them such a short time. It was a month of learning together, growing together, and laughing till our cheeks hurt too much to continue (and then laughing a little more). It is a great joy to meet people from all walks of life and all ages that share this deep common interest and love of yoga.

taken on Bald Mountain during a hike a group of us took after our graduation.

Triangle Pose on Bald Mountain

Even though I already “knew” these teachings of yoga and meditation, the program broadened and deepen my understanding in ways I couldn’t have anticipated. It also made me grow. With one week left in the program I felt like I had given it everything I had. I felt like I was being stretched (haha) beyond what I could handle.

I started thinking, Why was I putting myself through all this? Why did I want to be yoga teacher anyway? I found myself wishing I could just find God by staying in my little cabin in the woods. I asked Trimurti (who leads the Karma Yoga program) if he had a few minutes to talk. I told him how I felt like I didn’t have what it takes to be a yoga teacher and explained what I was going through.

Trimurti helped remind me of the bigger picture. There was only a small bit of time till I completed the program, then I would be able serve people in this way. A weight began to lift off my shoulders and a veil lifted from my mind.

I began to remember the reason I had taken this program in the first place. It was to serve Master and help spread these teachings. It was to be a channel for His light in the world. Me be a channel? There had been some self-limiting part in my mind saying “Who me? Who am I to be a channel? I’m just a simple devotee. I can’t do that.”

And so I pushed the thought of me being a teacher away. But, in that talk with Trimurti, the tide was turned (bless you Trimurti). I was able to accept that I could in fact be a channel for Master in the world. I again saw this training then on the much broader scale of life-purpose. I wasn’t just trying to become a yoga teacher. I was trying to become a better channel for the Light. Now that was a cause I could get behind with my whole body, mind, heart and soul.

 

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10 Responses

  1. Lisa Clark says:

    Peter ~ yes, you are just a “simple devotee,” and those are the kind God loves best… and so do the rest of us. We are all blessed by your devotion and light in this world.

  2. D'Arcy says:

    Once I started teaching Ananda yoga, I realized right away how I could become a channel. There are days when going to teach starts to feel like a chore. But then I get there, whether I am feeling tired or sluggish, I just say a prayer and begin to teach. I get my little egoic self out of the way and God just starts to flow. It is so amazing. I totally forget that I was tired or feeling lazy. People tell me how they love the class and I can see the lightness they feel once it is over. God is so ever-present the entire time, when teaching Ananda yoga.
    I believe you will find that it is one of the best things you have done for yourself and others!

    joy to you!

  3. Mary Kretzmann says:

    Thanks for writing this, Peter. I am glad you didn’t quit! Funny how the darkness of self-doubt tries to enter just as a person is breaking into new ground of spiritual service… But you stuck with it and now you are in new territory. The darkness lost that round. Every time we break toward Light, we win soul freedom.
    Love,
    Mom

  4. Nancy Cralle says:

    Congratulations on your journey. I’m sure you will be a wonderful and joyful light to serve master. Many blessings to you, Nancy

  5. Nirmoha Gladen says:

    Blessings to you, Peter!
    Teaching is a great opportunity for growth as well as service. The reinforcement of what you have learned is strengthened by teaching. And in that you go deeper. I love that I get to teach hatha yoga twice a week here in Palo Alto.
    See you this summer!

  6. lahari elizabeth says:

    Congratulations! Peter,
    Nothing like the adventures you will know as a channel for His light. As “the instrument is blessed by that which flows through it,” you have just opened the door to a whole lot of joy!
    All the best,
    lahari elizabeth palmer

  7. Lori Wise says:

    Peter,
    It was an honor to share this YTT journey with you. Thank you for writing and sharing this. It is an inspiration and encouragement to me to push through any insecurities in myself as well. You have adequately reminded me that I don’t have to be the ‘perfect’ yoga teacher, I just have to be the channel for the Divine to flow through me. That is what renders it all perfect.
    You are a wonderful Soul and I am blessed beyond measure that our paths crossed, again. :)
    Peace, Love & Light,
    Lori Wise

  8. Victoria Hansen says:

    Peter…you are awesome!!! So young and simply awesome!! victoria

  9. sharon says:

    beautiful.
    i wanted to share a quote of mother Teresa i came across this morning.

    We can do no great things;
    only small things with great love.

  10. Heidi says:

    I thought I’d have to read a book for a disceorvy like this!