Sir, My Dad fell ill one day & the very next day I had to go to my office to complete my relieving formalities..on my way back Home, my Dad passed away.. I feel so guilty of losing such a Devoted Father. I dont know why I am alive & what to do?? What should I do for him??
—Srividya, India
Dear Srividya,
I am very sorry for the loss of your father. It is a shock and a loss. He is such a good soul. You will see him again. Our Guru, Paramhansa Yogananda taught that families are drawn together by karmic bonds of love, or bonds of hate. Yours is a bond of love. Even though it is difficult to love your father now, please try to rejoice for him that he is free in a higher realm. He did not have to suffer much illness at the end. It was very quick. That is how some souls choose to go.
I am not speaking lightly, for I know how difficult loss can be. My husband died in August 2012. He was only age 61. On the one hand, it seemed much too soon to lose him. I would have loved to be with him another three or four decades, into our elder years. And I would wish that our three grown children could have him in their lives now, and our two young grandchildren were both born after Timothy died. I am sorry that they will not know him in the normal way. Even so, I am grateful that we were able to raise our family together. Timothy died when our youngest was age 19, and in his second year of college. I am grateful for those blessings while I also grieve the loss of his physical presence. I wrote more about it here: When the Miracle Is Withheld: A Story of Loss and Transcendence.
As you grieve the loss of your father, please also practice gratitude for the years you did have. This will help you to heal. Send love to your father’s soul, even now.
We will all have to leave this world one day. Each lifetime brings us different lessons. Sometimes, for whatever reason, certain souls may not want to “grow old.” Perhaps in another lifetime they felt weak and helpless in old age, so in this lifetime they want to die before any feebleness occurs. It is easy to imagine that this might be so.
I have included, below, some quotes from Paramhansa Yogananda on loss and death. I hope you find them helpful. Some of the suggestions take great focus and concentration, and this is harder to achieve in the time period of raw grief. Please read through the suggestions and start with the easier ones first. Please also feel free to contact me if I can be of further help to you or to your family.
May you be blessed.
In Divine Light and Love,
Mary Kretzmann, director
Ananda Healing Prayer Ministry
Communicating with Departed Loved Ones
By Paramhansa Yogananda
Communicating with departed loved ones, like the existence of life after death, is a closely guarded secret. Only selfless, patient, all-loving individuals are able to establish a link with departed loved ones after death.
To communicate with a departed loved one, concentrate deeply at the point between the eyebrows until you can see your spiritual eye with both closed and open eyes. You must be able to hold that concentrated state for as long as you desire. Then visualize the soul you want to meet and constantly broadcast to him to come into the light. Only good souls, who loved you and whom you love, should be invited.
If you have patience and strong personal zeal, eventually you will be able to see and speak to that image on the screen of the spiritual eye, as in a talking picture. With greater spiritual development, you will be able to see, with open eyes, souls you once knew and loved. In true communication with a departed soul, one should not lose consciousness — one should consciously commune with the invited soul. These states are usually devoid of exciting emotions.
Only by deep, incessant meditation can you bring your dear departed loved ones to you. It may take months, or even years, but if you are patient and keep increasing the depth of your call in meditation, you will succeed.
Send your thoughts of love and goodwill to your loved ones as often as you feel inclined to do so, but at least once a year — perhaps on some special anniversary. Mentally tell them, “We will meet again sometime and continue to develop our divine love and friendship with one another.” If you send them your loving thoughts continuously now, someday you will surely meet them again. You will know that this life is not the end, but merely one link in the eternal chain of your relationship with your loved ones.
To send your thoughts to loved ones who have passed on, sit quietly in your room and meditate upon God. When you feel His peace within you, concentrate deeply at the Christ center, the center of will at the point between the two eyebrows, and broadcast your love to those dear ones who are gone.
Visualize at the Christ center the person you wish to contact. Send to that soul your vibrations of love, and of strength and courage. If you do this continuously, and if you don’t lose the intensity of your interest in that loved one, that soul will definitely receive your vibrations. Such thoughts give your loved ones a sense of well-being, a sense of being loved. They have not forgotten you any more than you have forgotten them.
Excerpts from Karma and Reincarnation: The Wisdom of Paramhansa Yogananda, Volume 2.
See also How to Solve the Mystery of Live After Death, an article by Paramhansa Yogananda.
