Refreshing Our Love

Every so often, Divine Mother blesses our lives with something that opens wide the door of our hearts. My earliest memories of awakening in Love are with my mother. Though I knew nothing of higher states of consciousness, the love that was poured into me through my mother seemed to bring me into an immensely enjoyable and secure state of being.

Then there were my pets: kittens and golden retrievers, mostly. The interspecies chasm that words can rarely bridge provides a number of more meaningful ways to share awareness together. There are no arguments when words do not exist. I spent many hours with my pets in mutual appreciation of the life we had together.

our cat ‘Louie’

And of course, romance. Most certainly it is human relationships that come to mind when this word is mentioned. When we feel strongly attracted to another and it is reciprocated in full, our hearts are bursting with joy—temporarily of course—and this can cause us to act as if we are intoxicated with a most magical, blissful elixir.

Yogananda says, “If you could feel even a particle of Divine Love, so great would be your joy—so overpowering—you could not contain it.”

When I read this statement, I thought to myself, “My goodness! I do not know what Love really is! Then, what have I been experiencing when I thought I was in Love?”

What is Divine Mother giving us when a person or situation awakens our heart? She is showing us a sneak peek of our destiny. She is giving us glimpses of what Her Love feels like.

When I met my wife, Melody, the way that she loved me was so fulfilling to my heart. She and I would meditate with great love and gratitude within for having been brought together and we would direct that love and gratitude where it belonged—to God alone, the source of that Love. The depth that we experienced in this was like none we had known.

Kalidas and Melody on their wedding day

This got me to thinking: “God must give us these great experiences of Love in order that we can then offer that energy to Him and truly dive deep in our meditations. Almost like He fills our airplanes with fuel and it is up to us to fly towards Him!”

But, as I mentioned already, these are temporary events. During these states of intoxication, many will pledge to one another various worn out one-liners such as the infamous, “You complete me!” or, “I can’t live without you!”

I don’t think I’m alone in saying that every time I have had this approach to anything in life I have met with sadness and disillusionment—simply because it ended.

The ancient teachings of Patanjali describe the goal of Yoga as ‘smritti’, or ‘divine memory’. We remember who and what we really are. This is the end result of Yoga.

In most relationships, though the love is strong in the beginning, it  tends to gradually diminish if it is not renewed regularly. In other words, we can easily forget. So it is in our relationship with God. We meditate in order to remember—to renew this love daily and to train ourselves to keep it alive within us at all times.

It seems to me, however, that it is sometimes hard to remember how to love God without some kind of experience of love here in this tangible world to ‘jog our memories’.

Just a couple of weeks ago, Melody and I gave birth (well, she did most of the work!) to our son, Japa. We watched this precious soul, whose body grew inside her belly for nine long months, become a baby boy who we are privileged to welcome into this world. My heart can feel this cherished Love again. Ecstatic tears flowed powerfully from us as he took his first breaths in this incarnation. Such beauty and sweetness as no words can describe.

Japa and Melody

As I sat to meditate a couple of hours after the birth and he was peacefully resting on his mommy, I looked at our newborn son and thought to myself, “The love I feel for him is a gift from God. Let me always try to expand it, to share it.”

I closed my eyes, uplifted my gaze, and had a most memorable meditation. I offered all my gratitude for a safe and healthy birth surrounded by a spiritual family who was rejoicing in his arrival as much as we were. The thought came to me that Divine Mother gives us these kinds of experiences in order to refresh our memory of Her Love. And yes, it is also She who taketh away when circumstances, in themselves, become the center of our fulfillment.

“Now, don’t forget about this Love and where it comes from! Use this Love to serve all!” She says.

As I write these words, a two week old beautiful angel of a boy sleeps by my side and I inwardly say, “Thank you Ma, I will not forget this time!” Looking into his joyful, astral eyes, I see more clearly than ever before that the purpose of all life’s experiences is to deepen our love for God.

Swami Kriyananda says about those whom we hold most dear, “They are given to you to show how MUCH you can love…so that you may discover your capacity for loving.”

It is certainly true that, in those moments in which we experience great love, we are being shown the way out of delusion. If we could love all beings in that capacity, surely we would already be one with God.

All of these events that seem to stand alone as highlights on the timeline of our lives have only one underlying purpose—to give us a glimpse of smritti, to remind us what Heaven truly is and to accelerate our progress on this highway home to Her.

Japa Walter Hansen, Born January 21st, 2014 10:29am