How Do I Overcome Hurt in My Relationship?


Hi..I met this person for the first time in my life 4 years back and had super strong positive vibes from her as if i know her from before. Over the years we shared excellent rapport with each other. It was only some time back that I have felt hurt from her actions and have felt very strong repulsive vibes from her so much so that I don’t even feel like talking to her.I am certain that it’s karmic connection. And I know she is a nice lady .I am angry and hurt. How do I overcome my emotions?

—Devika, India


Hello Devika,

Your question of how to overcome hurt in a relationship is universal as we’ve all been hurt in relationship at one time or another. You mention this relationship feels karmic. Thus the question is twofold, how to end the karma and how to overcome the hurt. The answer may be the solution to both questions.

I suggest you do some self introspection to see if anything you have done may have set off this cycle of repulsion from your friend. Then examine if there is some sort of theme that may have occurred in your life at another time, perhaps in another relationship. When you are deeply centered and calm within yourself, perhaps after a meditation, ask yourself, “What is the lesson I need to learn?” See what answer comes naturally to your heart and pay attention!

Emotions are very powerful. For the devotee, they can either bind us in attachment and limitation or when offered up to Divine Mother for transformation, they can free us. The feeling of hurt is within you. Can you choose not to be hurt by your friend’s behavior and forgive her? Do you need to meet with her and perhaps discuss a possible misunderstanding? Is this a relationship that you want to continue or simply bless and walk away?

Pay close attention to your reactions and learn how you can grow ever closer to God by letting go of your attachment to your friend. This not only is freeing for you but also for her as it is truly unconditional love!