In the following letter, Swami Kriyananda responds to a man who mistook his yearning for God as a sign that he needed a romantic relationship.
I have prayed and meditated on your letter, and shall do my best to answer it. Your desire for a romantic relationship seems to me the essence of what your soul longs for in its relationship with God. I’m not saying, don’t seek a wife, or that you should enter a monastery. But I am saying, seek a loving relationship above all with God—with the Divine Mother, if you will.
It seemed to me as I read your letter that there has been a certain dryness in your search; that it has been too intellectual. Swami Sri Yukteswar, the great saint of wisdom wrote in his book The Holy Science, that the first thing one must develop on the path is the heart’s love, and that one cannot move one step on the path without that love.
I think that is why you long for a romantic relationship. Your heart is actually longing for much more than that.
Don’t go too much by thought. It isn’t a saint’s thoughts that make him outstanding. It’s his perceptions. But all this will unfold as you develop your heart’s qualities more.
Another thing that will help you very much is satsang—good company. It would be a good thing to visit Ananda sometime.
In divine friendship