I read the post about the interpretation about Genesis and that Adam and Eve were not to have sex so that they would not stimulate the sex organs. Evidently this would create the basal instincts and allow humans to procreate like animals (?). I have always wondered why as humans women do not have more natural control over when we are fertile; and that we can get pregnant without our knowing and even against our will. Is there a way to separate sex for enjoyment and sex for procreation?
—Tammy Tambrella, USA
Dear Tammy:
What you are asking is “Can physical actions be separated from physical consequences?” “Can I eat nothing but cream puffs and still win the Boston Marathon?” “Can I never practice and still become a great pianist?”
Sex has many dimensions other than reproduction, most notably, a perceived sense of great pleasure.
What the Adam and Eve story tells us, however, is that we have descended to the level of sexual pleasure. When we live in the bliss of our true divine nature, sex is seen to be merely, well, animalistic by comparison.
However, to quote Mahatma Gandhi’s advice for developing self-control, “Never give up one pleasure until you have replaced it with a higher one.” In other words, let your experience be your guide. Not dogma. Not guilt. But your actual experience.
To actually learn from your experiences — and not merely have them — you must be honest and pay attention. If you are, experience will teach you that actions have consequences.
You can question that principle, even rail against it, but, in the end, reality wins. Sex, for example, makes babies. Not always, but often enough to influence your choices. Even more importantly, over-indulgence in sex, especially, pleasure-oriented, self-centered sex, coarsens one’s consciousness. Selfishness always does. It also saps your energy.
Young people think they are immune. But young people become middle-aged people and then old people and how you live catches up with you. Look around. You see the evidence everywhere. You can also learn by observation.
Still, sex has a valid place in human relationships. But it has to be used responsibly, which means lovingly and selflessly.
As for women having control over their reproductive systems, by means other than chemical or surgical, of course they can. Anyone, by the development of yogic power, can have mastery over the physical plane, which includes one’s own body.
But that kind of mastery does not come by mere wishful thinking. You have to rise above all physical compulsions, which brings you into contact with your own divine nature. At which point, of course, sex no longer has the same attraction. Why eat at MacDonald’s when you can go to the best restaurant in town?
Even so if it is your dharma to marry and have children, you may still have sex, but you are not compelled to do so.
Freedom is not the ability to do whatever you want, it is the ability to choose in all circumstances that which will bring you the greatest happiness. Not merely in the moment, but for all eternity.
Sex is one of God’s most excellent ways of helping us learn the difference between dharma and desire. Dharma takes us into higher consciousness, desire keeps us going around and around on the wheel of reincarnation.
This answer has barely skimmed the surface of what might be said on this subject. Feel free to pose another question.
In divine friendship,
Nayaswami Asha
