Helping a Loved One Grow Beyond Their Limitations


My husband is quite an introvert and once he faces a tough situation with people I tend to see him quit or withdraw. I have been trying to encourage him to stay in the situation and be positive but am unable to. It is not like I don't want to accept this part of him but I see him wanting to change this about himself but trapped in the habit. I tried to encourage him to read Master's habits book. Nothing is working. Please guide me

Thanks for your time and patience.


—Rekha, India


Dear Rekha,

As a wife and doctor seeing many patients I can appreciate your desire to help your husband grow beyond his own limitations.

We care about someone and see so clearly what the person may need to do to expand and transcend a habit or self-limitation. At the same time we can only suggest and encourage a particular solution or action, we can never impose our will onto someone else.

Your husband’s nature is the result of many lifetimes of karma and perhaps his primary lesson in this lifetime is to learn to be strong in himself when confronted with difficult people or situations. He may struggle with this for the rest of his life or he may completely work through it in a few days, months or years.

Our part is to be patient and pray for God’s grace in helping the person we care about. Perhaps pray that your husband be filled with God’s “peace and harmony, peace and harmony.” (See Yogananda’s prayer below.)

You may want to consider putting your husband’s photo in the lower right corner of your Guru’s photo on your personal altar that you may see the Guru’s grace flowing to your husband.

I sometimes ponder how long God has waited for each of us to wake up to our Divine Reality. I try to remember that I too am not fully awakened and have many lessons to learn. This helps me to be patient with others as God has been infinitely patient with me!

May you feel the joy of knowing that each moment is your opportunity to awaken within your self and that your husband too will awaken in his own time.

God bless you,

World Peace and Harmony Prayer
by Paramhansa Yogananda

Please do this prayer once a day, or more, if possible.

Visualize the world in light, and for one minute pray:“Lord, fill this world with peace and harmony, peace and harmony.”

Then visualize yourself/husband in light and pray for 15 seconds:“Lord, fill me/him with peace and harmony, peace and harmony.”