Is it OK to remain attached to (i.e. love) people, or will it cause me to reincarnate again and again?
What steps should I take during life to ensure that I never have to reincarnate again?
Any strong human attachment or desire will keep us reincarnating again and again. Each of us has an extraordinarily large bundle of seeds of past karma, born by attachment and desire.
If we were to work on each of them one by one, it would take us forever. Even if we were ever to finish, there would be a brand new bundle of karma, since we would likely have been acting from attachment and desire, thus creating even more desires and attachments.
The solution is to eliminate the root cause of what makes us come back again and again.
We do that by freeing ourselves of desire and attachment itself, rather than just the many individual objects of that attachment.
The quickest way to do that is through a practice such as Kriya Yoga, and the help and blessing of a Guru.
Kriya is the very best technique for helping us to change our identification from this little self, to our Infinite Self.
Kriya is rightly practiced with deep devotion for God. As we develop that desire for God, and for divine bliss, we begin to have glimmers of that bliss in meditation. Over time, that bliss, and the freedom of the soul, begin to have a stronger attraction than the many ties that bind us.
That’s the big picture, and perhaps more than what you were asking! In regard to individual attractions and attachments, there are ways that the yogis have taught to work with them.
For example, we should try to love those who are close to us with God’s love, rather than with purely human love. Serve others selflessly, rather than asking “what can I get from this relationship?” Not only can we help others much better in that way, but we will also become more free in ourselves.
This question about reincarnation is really what the spiritual path is all about. When we become inwardly free, then we will not have to reincarnate — unless we do so to come back to help others. That is what God-realized Masters do.
You can learn a great deal more about this subject in two books: