Mending Relationships

Question

I have been looking for a solution to a problem for many days and while surfing saw this site. Someone very dear to me, out of a misunderstanding, hates me so much and snubs me that it feels unbearable. I feel scared to even approach that person out of fear of being snubbed. I have never meant any harm to that person but it was just situational which had compelled me to be harsh to that person on one occasion wen it was her fault and she knew it very well. Is there any way to reduce the negativity?

—Sohan, India

Answer

Dear Sohan,

The first thing that is appropriate is to apologize for the harsh words you said to the woman. She probably felt your anger or other negative emotion more than the truth of the words you expressed to her (assuming the words were true and not hurtful).

Then ask if you can meet to discuss the situation that led you to express yourself so harshly in order to heal the rift between you. Don’t try to defend yourself or blame her. Simply listen to her side of the story calmly and try to understand her position. From there, build on what she shares with a desire to be cooperative and work together for the highest good.

If she is unwilling to meet, pray Yogananda’s peace and harmony prayer for her. This involves repeating the words, “Fill her with Thy peace and harmony, peace and harmony, peace and harmony” whenever you think of her.

Stay centered in your peace and harmony and send it to her from your heart whenever you see her.

Joy to you.