Hope all is well with at Ananda.
Why is sex discouraged before marriage? Due to current social norms regarding that it is mandatory to have sex with a boyfriend while in relationship(s) before marriage takes place. What does Master say about that? Should it be restricted? Or is it Ok? I read in a christian book that when Solomon came into sexual contact with the egyptian models, it’s as if the Gods those ladies worshipped came into contact with his energy and thus he fell.plz expand topic
—Meena, United Kingdom
I have been thinking about your question, and here are some thoughts about this very important and little understood part of our nature. I would first like to share with you a quote from the Finding Happiness book, by Swami Kriyananda, in response to the “current social norms” that you mentioned.
See yourself as a cause, not an effect. Accept from others only what you choose to accept: their good suggestions but not their insistence on them; their constructive criticisms but not their anger. Radiate into the world around you the light of faith and wisdom.
This statement assumes that people are looking to gain light and faith and wisdom in their lives. In the yogic tradition, the sexual energy itself, unless it is understood and used rightly, is considered one of the great obstacles to spiritual enlightenment.
This is because it is a very powerful energy that can be used either to uplift you spiritually or to draw you deeper into delusion. When this energy is expressed outwardly in sexual union, it draws the energy in the spine down, and into the lower chakras. If it is over-used, then it can gradually dissipate a person’s overall energy. This, naturally, depends on how frequently a person engages in sexual activity.
On the other hand, if we work to transmute and uplift the sexual energy, we find that it supports our spiritual development, filling us with great strength and joy. Yogananda refers to this process in the book The New Path, by Swami Kriyananda. In the chapter on Renunciation, he explains to a group of his monks,
If the sex drive were taken away from you, you would see that you had lost your greatest friend. You would lose all interest in life. Sex was given to make you strong. If a boxer were to fight only weaklings, he too would grow weak in time. It is by fighting strong men that he develops strength. The same is true in your struggle with the sex instinct. The more you master it, the more you will find yourself becoming a lion of happiness.
At Ananda we have found it helpful to work with the idea of balance in the process of “mastering” the sexual energy. Since most people are not looking to live a life of complete celibacy, it’s usually more helpful for them to work on gradually channeling the sexual energy upward using the techniques of yoga. If you want to grow spiritually, then you will want to know more about how to use this energy for your own highest happiness and fulfillment.
Suggested reading on this topic would be:
- The New Path, by Swami Kriyananda, especially the Chapter on Renunciation (available online)
- The Essence of the Bhagavad Gita, by Swami Kriyananda, in the index, “sexuality”
Both of these books may be purchased from Crystal Clarity Publishers.