Can My Wife and My Parents Become Harmonious?


My wife is from the city, and my family lives in very small town. We live in another city, where I work. My wife tries her best to make my parents happy, but they always have some complaints about her. In many cases, I do not think my wife did anything wrong, but I fail to convince my parents of this. I am unhappy because of this mismatch. I know in many cases, my parents are also right. The problem is that both are right, according to where they are coming from, for it is based on their thoughts. How I can make my wife & my parents both happy? Thank you!

—Sankar, India


Dear Sankar,

Complete harmony within one’s family is often a difficult state to achieve, especially among in-laws; but it is worth the effort in trying to make it happen. In any case, the very first person who has to be harmonious is you, above all other things, but also with God and your own higher Self.

Do you meditate daily and pray for help and guidance in this and all of life’s challenges? That would be a good place for you to begin. Changing yourself spiritually is the best step toward changing your environment and the people in it.

We can never make everybody in the world happy, but we can make ourselves happy and harmonious; doing that, in turn helps everyone very much! You will be very surprised, if you sincerely work on it from that angle.

You might also try practicing (often!) Paramhansa Yogananda’s “Peace and Harmony” Prayer. Here are the instructions he gave us:

“Visualize the person in question being within the Divine Light and then pray from your heart ‘Lord, fill him/her with peace and harmony, peace and harmony.’ Repeat this over and over for about a minute. Then visualize yourself surrounded by a Divine Light and say ‘Lord, fill me with peace and harmony,’ for 15 seconds. “Do this 5 times a day. 3 or 4 times might work, but 5 times practically never fails.”