I’m a Kriyaban in India. I have been having a torrid two months, with issues concerning job, income and overall mental and spiritual well-being. I have tried to tune into Master and Swamiji with whatever I could, and have found great lessons in the experiences. However, I have been going through a lot of stress too, and I don’t feel their presence strongly like I used to. Nowadays I am anxious at the merest setback, and am worried if I have "used up my spiritual karma".
In what you have written you have indicated your effort to tune in with the Masters and that you have found benefit. Cling to this. They are present. To what extent will you be there for them? How can you have possibly used up your spiritual good karma if you are still thinking of the Masters and calling to them? You are generating good spiritual karma. Don’t give up. Take a moment whenever you can, as often as you can, to pause, close your eyes, and inwardly call to them.
“To those who think me near, I am near,” said Yogananda. You will see that they will get you through this and whatever future challenges come your way. Their consciousness is bigger than this test and every little obstacle. Keep inviting them into your heart and consciousness. They will help you to see things from their point of view, and you will be able to relax and let go.