I am married but living separately, for about 5 years. My spouse does not believe in God. He makes fun of Gurus and all spiritual philosophies. He is not ready to leave me, and says that he will love me forever and will not divorce. My question is: What should I do to break this deadlock? I have been praying for his happiness and his family’s blessings, but things have not been moving. If I file for divorce, is it escaping from my karma? I need some guidance to proceed and break this deadlock.
—Pooja, India
Dear Pooja,
We are sorry to hear of the difficulties in your marriage, and we will pray for you.
Several times I heard people ask Swami Kriyananda a question similar to yours. He was always very kind to people about divorce. He said that if you sincerely feel that you cannot stay in a marriage, especially for the reason you mention, that is, severe spiritual incompatibility, and if you feel you have done as much as you can to heal the split, then it may be the right thing to do to dissolve the marriage.
Yogananda also was very understanding about divorce and even gave an affirmation/prayer for people to use as they are struggling with this issue. You might want to use it at the close of every meditation: “Father, we came together in love. Teach us to live together in love, or, if it is Thy will, teach us to part in love and understanding.”
Filing for divorce will not allow you to escape from your karma. Our karma will surely come to us eventually, no matter what we do. But we can alleviate some of the harshness of past karma through our practice of Kriya Yoga meditation. Otherwise, it must be dealt with eventually, one way or another—but not necessarily with a specific person, like your husband.
Divorce is almost always painful for everyone involved. Do your best to pray, trust, and stay peaceful in your heart through meditation and attunement to God and Gurus. Then you’ll come through it as a stronger and more compassionate person, as a result of your efforts to stay in the center of God’s will for your life.
