Grief and Dreams


My Dad passed away nearly 2 years ago now, I still haven’t grieved properly and don’t let myself think about it much. I’ve had a few dreams about him, I’ve never been able to speak to him in my other dreams and he doesn’t seem to see me. However, last night, he was in my dream and we had a conversation, I can’t remember what about, but then he gave me a long tight hug and told me I need to be ready to let him go. What do you think this means? Thank you so much for your time.

—Kasia, England


Dear Kasia,

First, I am very sorry for your loss. Have you heard of the book, Karma and Reincarnation, by Paramhansa Yogananda? I believe it would be helpful to you in your process at this time.

Two things struck me about your message:

  1. “I still haven’t grieved properly and don’t let myself think about it much.”
  2. And in the dream, “He gave me a long tight hug and told me I need to be ready to let him go.”

The first, in which you say that you haven’t grieved properly, and yet you don’t let yourself think about it, can point to the strong possibility that you are actually grieving quite deeply, below the surface, and you are not allowing your self to move forward. It is akin to post-traumatic stress — kind of locked in time. His soul may be quite aware that his death has hurt you in some way, and he also couldn’t move forward because he was concerned for your wellbeing. But some growth has happened, simply through the passage of time, and the inescapability of you having to live your life without him here in his physical body. This allows some strength to develop, but the heart also needs to heal and be strong again, not only in terms of endurance, but with radiance and joy.

Love in never lost. His love was expressed in the long tight hug. Set some time aside and send him your love now. Talk to his soul, as he is trying to talk to you through the dream. Let the tears flow. It is natural to do so. But focus on sending him your love.

In regards to his statement, that you have to be ready to let him go — focus on letting him go into the Light. He will still be there for you, but perhaps not as often. It is quite possible that he has been checking in on you quite a lot — but it was like your earlier dreams: you both couldn’t communicate with each other. But now, it finally happened.

Years ago, a woman hear lost her son, age 24, in a tragic accident. She grieved deeply for him, and she would sometimes see signs of his presence. After about six months, she had a very powerful dream of his soul. In the dream he told her that he had work to do, and she would have to let him go, but not in the sense of forgetting him. It was more in the sense of letting him carry on with his new mission. He was serving the Light in some way. There was a sense that he would still be with her, but not as often.

A few years later, my husband, Timothy, died from cancer. Two weeks after my husband’s death, the mother, above, was at a Kriya Yoga initiation ceremony, when she felt an intuitive message from the soul of my late husband. He told her that he had seen her son, and he was doing well. So, even though her son had to move on — he was still there, connected to the Ananda group of souls in some way. He was not lost to his mother, but his focus was now on his new service.

Other people also received helpful messages and powerful guidance from my husband after his death, so this had a context that made sense. We are normally only given these little glimpses of “the other side,” but when we put them together with other people’s experiences we can get a bigger picture.

We can correspond more, if you like. Please feel free to contact me via this website.

May your heart be comforted, and blessed with Peace.

In Divine Friendship,
Mary Kretzmann

Ananda Healing Prayer Ministry

P.S. This quote from Paramhansa Yogananda may be of help to you now:

To send your thoughts to loved ones who have passed on, sit quietly in your room and meditate upon God. When you feel His peace within you, concentrate deeply at the Christ center, the center of will at the point between the two eyebrows, and broadcast your love to those dear ones who are gone.

Visualize at the Christ center the person you wish to contact. Send to that soul your vibrations of love, and of strength and courage.

If you do this continuously, and if you don’t lose the intensity of your interest in that loved one, that soul will definitely receive your vibrations. Such thoughts give your loved ones a sense of well-being, a sense of being loved. They have not forgotten you any more than you have forgotten them.