How Can I Handle My Wife’s Criticisms of Others?


My wife is a good lady. But she is always talking about others very badly, which I don't like. She is wasting her time and energy. She gets angry for whatever advise I give. I solicit your guidance.

—srinivasan, india


Dear Srinivasan,

Talking about others in a negative way leads to increased negativity in oneself. It’s like a downward spiraling circle and can quickly develop into a strong habit.

It seems your wife is caught by such a habit. You can help first of all by making sure that you, yourself, do not engage in such negative criticisms. Your positive energy can create a magnetic example that will subtly influence your wife.

In a supportive way try to encourage your wife to find something positive to say about others no matter what flaws they may have. It is said that how we perceive the world around us, especially other people and their qualities, reflects where our own consciousness is.

You might want to suggest that she send healing prayers to others, perhaps at first to loved ones or family members. Then she can expand those healing prayers to include those who she is critical of. It’s worth a try! Here is a link to find more information on Ananda’s Healing Prayer Ministry.

In divine friendship,
Nayaswami Pranaba