Please help me to find a solution to this. I didn’t have these traits earlier but have somehow developed them after a string of bad experiences.
Swami Kriyananda suggested that one way out of this type of dilemma is to think less of ourselves and more of how we can be of service to others. In this way we tend to “listen” to others more and feel less inclined to insert our opinions or thoughts on others. There’s no need to convince others, even if we absolutely feel that we know what is best! Simply offer your thoughts and ideas without any attachment and you will find that your emotions will be calmer.
Another approach is go on a “criticism fast”; start with doing an hour a day without being critical and then gradually increase this time so more and more of each day is freed from the carping spirit. And in place of criticism add the technique of blessing others. You can do this in silence by mentally showering others with blessings of AUM and joy.
And be sure to meditate daily to allow your consciousness to be transformed; this will then filter into every part of your life.
In divine friendship,