Soul Mates: What Yogananda Said and What You Can Do About It

Question

Hello! I wanted to know more abt what master thinks abt "soulmates". I have this strong connection with this man i met 2 yrs ago. For the past 2 years, things have happened that relate to him, but nothing romantic we just know each other. I feel that connection from him too but we don't really talk. If we meet we just say Hi and have a brief conversation. I can't seem to get over him even though i haven't seen him in a year now. Could this be the divine connection that master talked abt?

—SK, USA

Answer

Dear SK,

The concept of a soul mate is a very deep one and one rarely written about by Yogananda, from what I know. The idea is that in the beginning of creation a soul was split into two parts and that, before liberation, we have to in some way re-unite with that other half. It is something that is arranged by God, and not something that we can really seek on our own.

Swami Kriyananda has been very clear that this does not have to come in the form of a romantic relationship. In fact, romantic relationships, because many other levels are at play, are the most challenging to know if the peson is your soul mate.

Swamiji told the story of one saint riding on a train with his disciple. He said to the disciple, “Look at the woman in that other train.” The disciple felt an immediate and deep connection with her. That was his soul mate, and that connection was all that was needed for him.

I think in your situation, the question is not really if this person is your soul mate. The question is: what are you to do about this situation? I would recommend holding this person up to your Guru at the spiritual eye, saying: Here is my attachment to this person. I don’t know if it is for my highest good or not. I offer it into your hands to release me from this attachment or to clarify it in whatever way is for the highest good.

In his book Spiritual Relationships (now: How to Love and Be Loved), Yogananda gives this wonderful prayer and instruction:

The spiritual way to choose the right companion is to affirm deeply after meditation: “Heavenly Father, bless me that I choose my life companion according to Thy law of perfect soul union.

If you practice this affirmation for six months with deep faith, you will marry your right companion, or the Divine Father will bring about sudden unfavorable circumstances which completely prevent your wrong marriage.

In Spiritual Relationships, Yogananda also gives many suggestions on how to choose the right life partner.

Blessings and joy to you,
Anandi