I lost my fiancé just 2 months ago. He was my world, my everything. After his death, I have lost interest in life. I either feel like going to him and uniting with him as it remained his unfulfilled wish or sometimes I strongly wish he would just come back to me. Is it possible to connect with him or do anything so that I am at peace with myself? I wish death for myself. I wanted to walk the path of God but everything now seems meaningless.
My heart goes out to you and I feel the tragedy of your circumstance. As difficult as this is, death is not a finality.
Granted it looks that way, but life/death is a continuum. It is possible to connect and commune with your fiancé inwardly. Do this not in the thought of wishing he could be back here with you, but rather convey from your heart good wishes for his continued growth and freedom inside. This will make it easier for his soul on its forward journey, for his soul will be adjusting also to this abrupt separation.
We are not able to see God’s entire plan but must try to have faith in it — and in God — to give us what we need and to guide our individual path. Pray for understanding and acceptance. This does not mean that it is unacceptable to grieve. Grieving will be a process. Prayer, grieving, and time will help you to heal and glean understanding.
I wish you the best and hope that you are able in time to again feel God’s grace and presence. I refer you to the Astral Ascension Service to be read at the departure of a soul from this plane. It might help you to direct blessing and love to his soul and see and feel “life” as the journey of each soul through many lives.