I have been on the path for 2 years and my aura and speech has become much more kind, calm and considerate. I notice that some people at work are starting to mock me about my speech and the way I am, saying that I am too nice. I think they think I am weird or fake. I feel sad and am starting to withdraw and have become very reluctant and paranoid about human interaction. It's like I am having an identity crisis. Should I change my career to work with more like-minded individuals, or is this my karma and I should continue on?
—Patrick, Australia
Your transformation is truly an inspiration to all devotees! This change in your behavior is such a divine outcome of your dedication to God and Guru in your meditation efforts of the past 2 years.
God may be putting your commitment and sincerity to the test. This trial is perfect for your development of strength and stamina. Most devotees have experienced difficulties about how to relate to the world with dispassion and detachment as their inner life becomes the greater reality. Having the realization that to have the approval of friends or even family may not be there for us, is another step on the path. Also, being willing to accept that realization as coming from God for our growth. At the same time when with others that don’t understand your inner life, it is better to remain a little withdrawn so as not to invite unnecessary ridicule. Use common sense about this.
Another aspect to consider about you are going through is that you may be helping by your example to bless the people you work with in a very subtle way. This example may inspire them to also reach for their highest potential. You may be helping them although it will take years for them to attempt a change. Nevertheless, your greatest responsibility is your connection with God.
This present situation on the other hand, may not be a karma that is necessary any longer. If the opportunity comes of its own to change your environment and find a job or living situation with like minded people, of course, would be helpful for you. Environment is stronger than will power and you want to protect your spiritual life. Hold the question to the light in meditation and feel the answer in your heart. You will know when there is a new direction for you.
God does have a plan for you and it may not be obvious now. Be patient in your efforts and hold fast. Always end your meditation with a prayer in the language of your heart with love and gratitude for all that you have now. Ask for His blessing and you will be guided and protected.
Many Blessings.
