For years I have asked God, or some aspect of God, for help for a specific problem. It hasn’t helped. They say you must have faith. Well, I have enough faith to ask for help. But why should I have faith? Is God so weak that He can’t help if you don’t have enough faith? Then He/She is nothing but a weakling. They say you should learn something from this, it is your karma. Well, I have already learned. I don’t need 50 years to learn. The only conclusion is that God does not care and She is not love at all.
—Esak, None
Dear Esak,
I feel for you. But you must accept that God’s ways and wisdom are higher than ours. Maybe you still need that specific problem, for your growth.
We usually pray for a specific outcome. But if God would always grant our prayers, it would be a disaster most of the time. Problems make us strong. God Himself is strong and He/She wants us to be strong as well. You need to become strong. God might be telling you, “Believe in yourself, you can handle this specific problem. It is perfect for you.”
When you have learned what you are supposed to learn from this problem, you will say in the end: “Thank you, God. I now understand that I needed it.” But now is your time to grow. Ask: “What quality do I need to develop to tackle this problem? In what way is it an opportunity for me, for my growth?” Then act: develop that quality, day by day.
God loves you. Never doubt it. The Mother or Father simply won’t always give us what we ask for. He/She gives us what we need. Please trust.
It would be good for you to repeat this prayer/affirmation of Yogananda often:
Dear Father, whatever conditions confront me, I know that they represent the next step in unfoldment. I will welcome all tests because I know that within me is the intelligence to understand and the power to overcome.
You can do it!
In divine friendship,
Jayadev
