I Have Seen Only Misery in My Life


I have only seen misery all my life. Failures despite doing my best. Am almost 40, unemployed, unmarried, health at its worst. Am just alive. None of the illnesses show on the body and am ridiculed for being at home doing nothing. I have nobody and nothing to look forward to. Don't believe in god anymore. If everything is karma then where is god? Is it so very wrong even to expect basic necessities like food shelter and health?

—Kumari, India


Dear Kumari,

Thank you for your question. The world sometimes can be seen as only misery. Remember, you are never alone — especially when trying to improve your life. The Universe will respond in kind to any thoughts that you harbor. Here are some ideas on how to turn the flow of thoughts in an upward direction. These ideas will help you develop magnetism for jobs, marriage, and health.

Whatever your best looks like, build on that. Start where you are at this moment. Do what you consider to be your personal best. Doing your best will bring your greatest blessing. Knowing you are making that effort will build a momentum for a better life. Perceived failures are stepping stones for success! In other words, nothing is really a failure. It leads us to another door to open and go through.

Ask yourself, “Do I want to be happy?” Yogananda said, “the best way to be happy is to smile, and if you can’t smile, then turn the corners of your mouth up and pretend,” (this is paraphrased). You see the meaning here is: by beginning effort we are changing the little things. Your mood and brain chemistry changes with just a smile! Happiness becomes a part of who you are and how you see life.

Next ask yourself, “What am I grateful for?” The people in your life? The very people in your life that criticize you do care for you or would not be trying to help. Is the ridicule you describe meant as a way of “help” for your welfare? Even if it is poorly expressed, see this as a blessing and expression of caring and concern. Possibly see this as the “someone that cares” for you. That is another blessing in your life, even if in disguise and misguided.

Also, you are alive and that in itself is important and worth looking forward to — even to watch as an observer to see what your next step looks like! Breathing the free air on earth comes with a purpose (and responsibility) that still needs fulfillment. Begin by changing your thinking about what is available for you to do in life. Small steps may help. Look at your diet, exercise, friends, jobs and reach out for new ideas (as you are doing here). To have the necessities in life you do need to meet opportunity halfway. Change your expectations into acceptance for what is already in your life. Having a positive attitude will change the definition of misery and the reason it exists in your world. Karma can shift from this day forward with effort and willpower in rethinking our actions.

Lastly, it is never wrong to ask for peace, happiness and joy in your life. Begin now. Find a time and place to be quiet and open your heart. Sit with a straight spine, hands open upward on your lap, and ask to be filled in your heart with love and inspiration. This act, in itself, will lift you up to receive the blessings that are coming to you as a child of the Infinite Mother.

Many blessings on your efforts.

Joy to you,
Nayaswami Hassi