Swamiji and Master emphasized seeing God as the Divine Mother, but I still have difficulties in doing so. I’m very used to the 'Fatherly' figure, and have a 'Krishna-like' image of God. Other than Master’s image, I’m not able to relate to God in any lovable form nowadays. I wish to see God as the Divine Mother, but Swamiji also said to love God for His Bliss and not personally. As you can see, I’m pretty much confused here! How should I love God as Divine Mother such that it isn’t egoic?
—Kailash, India
Dear Kailash,
Swami Kriyananda and Yogananda “emphasized” seeing God as the Divine Mother only as a suggestion or inspiration. They might say, “If it inspires your heart, why not turn to the Divine Mother aspect of God, which is so close, and sweet, and merciful?”
But prayer is something completely personal and individual. They would not try to convince you, or push us into praying to Divine Mother if that doesn’t really inspire your heart, and if that prayer is “difficult” for you. The only indispensable ingredient in prayer is the natural love of our heart. Yogananda teaches:
“The Searcher of Hearts wants only your sincere love. He is like a little child: someone may offer Him his whole wealth and He doesn’t want it; and another cries to Him, ‘O Lord, I love You!’ and into that devotee’s heart He comes running.”
So please feel totally free to pray to God not as Mother, but as Father, Friend, Beloved, or formless, Light, or Ocean of Bliss.
In his Autobiography of a Yogi, Yogananda tells us: “Sometimes it is a test by God to delay the fulfillment of prayers. But He eventually appears to the persistent devotee in whatever form he holds dear. A devout Christian sees Jesus; a Hindu beholds Krishna, or the Goddess Kali, or an expanding Light if his worship takes an impersonal turn.
You see? God comes to you in the way you approach to Him with love. If it is Krishna, because Krishna is who inspires your heart, then He will come to you as Krishna. There is no need to change that at all.
We all need to feel into our own natural heart, asking ourselves: “Where do my love and devotion blossom naturally?” There lies the magic of our prayer.
May God be ever closer to your heart,
Jayadev