Hello....i am over emotional in nature....i cry a lot, even on small things....extremely over sensitive.also...i dont have any loving caring relationshios in my life...i m completely lonely...i dont have good bond with my family members.i dont like them.and on top of that i somehow end up being with people who backstab me...or dont like me. I dont feel like doing anything at all.
—Petals, Singapore
Dear Petals,
I am sorry to hear that your life experience has been so difficult and lonely. A very important tool to strengthen our ability to draw positive relationships and success in our lives is increasing our energy. Yogananda gave us many ways to do this as he felt increasing our energy and learning how to direct it were keys to spiritual success in this age.
We live sustained by Cosmic Energy. The first step to increase the flow of this energy into us requires that we willingly and consciously connect with and draw this energy into us. We can draw more energy through exercise, particularly the Energization Exercises that Yogananda taught. You can learn about these exercises at https://www.ananda.org/meditation/meditation-support/meditation-techniques/the-energization-exercises-of-paramhansa-yogananda/ Even practicing a few of these exercises twice a day will make a very noticeable difference in your level of vitality and enthusiasm.
We can open the gates of our consciousness to this energy through positive affirmation. Negative statements put thick veils around our soul making it difficult for the Light to penetrate. Positive statements pull back the veils. When our mind wants to say ‘I can’t’ counter it with ‘I CAN’. ‘I can’t’ and ‘I don’t want to’ are nothing but mental habits that can be undone with a powerful affirmation of the positive. When you affirm do not worry if there are a lot of your mental citizens that rebel and want to stay in the ditches of those habits. Positive statements are so strong that they will sooner or later transform these negative habits. These negative thoughts habits are only trapped energy and when that energy is released upward your will start to feel an infusion of positivity.
Try this from Affirmations for Self-Healing by Swami Kriyananda.
Happiness
Happiness is an attitude of mind, born of the simple determination to be happy under all outward circumstances. Happiness lies not in things, nor in outward attainments. It is the gold of our inner nature, buried beneath the mud of outward sense-cravings.
When you know that nothing outside you can affect you-no disappointment, no failure, no misunderstanding from others-then you will know that you have found true happiness.
Resolve strongly to keep this flame burning ever in your heart.
Affirmation (Repeat loudly, in a normal voice, softly and in a whisper. Do this at least 5 times a day.)
I vow from today onwards to be happy under every circumstance. I came from God’s joy. I am joy!
Prayer
O Lord of Joy, fill me with boundless happiness. For I am Thy child, made in Thy blissful image. As Thou art Joy, so also, in my inner self, am I.
Finally, when we are channels of energy to others, that is serving and giving to others, the Divine fills us with an infinite flood of energy to accomplish our task and we, as instruments, are blessed also. It would be wonderful if you can find a way to serve others in need. Perhaps there is a volunteer opportunity serving those who have limited finances or who are unwell. Maybe there is a person or persons near you that you know are in need. What is important is to give, to open the channel of energy to flow through you and out to others. This giving is selfless; that is with no expectation that you receive anything in return from those you serve. When we open our hearts to others in a giving way we attract friends everywhere.
You tell how your heart is sad and sensitive. The heart becomes that way when it feels separated from Divine Love. Divine Love is another expression of the Divine Energy we have been discussing. Once your heart is infused with this Energy it will be full to overflowing and there will no longer be a sense of lack.
You might want to speak in person with a counselor regarding your concerns and these topics. A counselor could connect with you quite specifically and encourage on your journey. Meanwhile I am sending you prayers and seeing you vibrant with God-given vitality and joy.
Many Blessings,
Nayaswami Mukti