Why do so many older women (mothers and mother in laws) mistreat their daughters and in law,and misuse their power? I am a woman and was severely abused by my mother, and mistreated by a very rude mother in law. It has always bothered me that older women who are supposed to be wiser instead cause so much problems. I have a lot of trauma from both experiences and even considering not having children due to not wanting a link w/my husband’s mother and family. The in laws live out of state.
So sorry to hear about such difficulties. God always sends us what we can handle and for a reason and for our benefit. Even though it may not be possible to understand why such hard situations come to us and how are they helping us.
Try to remain in your center with these hurts. Even though these circumstances have been for your entire life it is never too late to change the karma. Most of all it is never too late to change our reaction to the difficult circumstance. Without analyzing the ‘whys’ of this happening begin, now, to be an observer of your life. That practice will allow an openness to God’s grace and His love and that will support your efforts. You will need to reach to God and hold Him as your support.
Whether to have children or not in your life has to be determined by your dharma. You may be a wonderful mother as all the experiences thus far have shown you how you want to raise children. Ask for God’s guidance during meditation on the direction that will be the right one for you.
Also, during meditation, in the language of your heart ask God, with self offering and love to be with you in your life. Forgiveness may be the first thing you will need to have in your opened heart. He will help you. Below is a link to a powerful prayer. Please consider practicing this several times a day especially when your mind begins a negative course. You can reinforce your efforts with this prayer.