Faith vs. Blind belief


Is it wrong to believe in a person despite knowing that they are hurting you and taking advantage of you. I believed in a person, and we got married and he left me just 3 days after our marriage. I was very happy then and now I feel my life is shattered. I always believe people on their face value, is it wrong. Is it wrong being simple and truthful.

I am jobless and penniless now. My life is in a big turmoil. I try to meditate but unable to concentrate. What should I do now.

—Shriya, India


Dear Shriya:

Faith has to be based on experience. Otherwise it is just wishful thinking.

You say you “believed” in him, but unfortunately it was blind belief. “Blind” because the facts were right in front of you but you refused to believe them. This was not a truthful action.

Yes, your husband, like all sentient beings, has the divine within him. But it is also true that people have a widely varying capacity to express that divinity.

To be truthful you have to look at all levels of reality, and relate appropriately to all of them.

To marry this man when, self-evidently he was not going to be a good husband, was not a truthful action. It was just wishful thinking.

You say you “always believe people on their face value.” You have good motive in doing this, but it is not wisdom. What people present at “face value” is often neither simple nor true.

To be spirtual means to relate to things as they actually are, not as they merely appear to be.

This doesn’t mean you have to be cynical and suspicious. Not at all. Things as they actually are includes the fact that everything is a manifestation of God. It also includes, however, a realistic understanding that not everyone is able to express God perfectly. And when we meet those who don’t, we have to behave appropriately.

We can’t take them, then at “face value” because the face value may not be true.

As for what to do now, I would say: Put this experience behind you. Deal courageously with the problem at hand, which seems to be to find a way to earn money to take care of yourself.

Keep the company of God in your heart. Meditate when you can. Talk to Him all the time. Share with Him your thoughts and feelings and pray for His guidance.


Nayaswami Asha