Relationships and Renunciation


Hi there. I have what for me is a hard question. Is it falling to the desire of sex if its just my girlfriend who asks for it ? I have said no many times without haste but I don’t want to ruin this relationship because of sex. I feel God's love in her. What should I do? Because I don’t desire it anymore. But I can’t let her suffer, can I? I can’t. What to do? I follow these teachings of your Master very strictly myself.

—Dan, united states


Dear Dan,

It’s common for a sincere spiritual seeker to want to leave sex behind. However, when two people share a committed relationship, the needs of each person must be respected. Sex is a powerful desire, and if one of the partners has that desire, it’s quite normal, and the other person should honor it. It doesn’t have to be a constant thing, after all. Just remember when having sex to take God with you. Give love and make sure that the occasion uplifts both of you.