May I ask a question? How do I offer up the remorse and anguish to Yogananda or God?
How do I see God as the Doer of both good and bad actions? So I can tell myself it's actually God who did it?
I'm deeply grateful — how much you care to help devotees like me.
—Devotee, USA
Dear Fellow Devotee,
You have asked about remorse and anguish. The first thing to be very clear about is Yogananda’s guidance: “God does not mind your faults, He minds your indifference.” No matter what we have done in the past (and how very few there are who have not done things we deeply regret), God does not want us to focus on our mistakes.
Why? — because in focusing on our mistakes, we drag our mind down to the darkness of discouragement, which is truly the Satanic power trying to pull us from God.
As Sri Yukteswar says in Autobiography of a Yogi: “Forget the past! The past lives of all men are dark with many shames. Everything in future will improve if you make a spiritual effort now.”
Take his words seriously about forgetting past errors. Instead, ask yourself: What can I learn from that mistake so that I don’t repeat it? How can I resolve to be better? How can I resolve to give more of my love trustingly to my Guru, drawing on his strength that is available to me within myself?
Sister Gyanamata said something like: I dissolve the thought of my littleness in the worshipful thought of Your greatness.
Don’t worship your past errors or what you consider to be your current faults.
God will be very pleased, if you focus instead on His bliss within you, His love within you. Who you really are is a perfect soul, a child of God. All that you have been focusing on is part of the small and temporary part of your existence.
Chant to God with joy and love! Refocus your mind on loving service to others and prayers for their well-being. If you have hurt soomeone in the past, surround them now in God’s healing light. See your past mistakes as prods, merely, to your ultimate perfection.
In divine friendship,
Anandi
