What is the Right Attitude Toward Those Who Mistreated Us?


What is the right attitude to have towards those that mistreat(ed) us? It is difficult for me to feel love toward them like Swamiji feels toward Daya Mata,for ex. On one hand everything that comes to us is from Divine Mother, on the other it's from our karma. It is difficult to be grateful for certain hurts and to see them as coming from God. But if it comes from karma, thinking that "it happened because I deserved it" doesn't feel right either. I do kriya and know the peace and harmony prayer.



Dear One,

You ask a very good question that has a multitude of “right” answers. And, depending on the how you were mistreated developing the “right” attitude doesn’t make the hurt automatically go away. Until we learn how to redefine the hurt as a sensation the hurt can be quite painful until we choose to feel guru’s grace.

It doesn’t matter much were the hurt comes from, be it from Divine Mother, Master or karma, for it all comes from God. And who in their “right” mind wants to go through the distress of learning how to redefine pain? We do! We’re devotees. Our only reality is in God. But, we forget and tend to get caught up in His dramas.

We want to learn how to redefine pain because our good karma placed us on a spiritual path that is designed by God to bring us to complete liberation in God. We want to be strong devotees in the midst of crashing worlds. And with growing stronger spiritually, mentally, physically or emotionally a little pain/discomfort may be involved. For more clarity, I highly recommend listening to Yogananda’s CD, “Removing all Sorrow and Suffering.” Until then, offer your suffering to God through your spiritual eye with a loving open heart. It may take a while to master this process but it’s worth it because it works like magic to remove pain, suffering and sorrow from our being. And this simple but super conscious process brings us ever new, ever increasing joy.

The “right” attitude involves choosing to learn how to accept all things good and bad equally for they come from our Divine Mother with the soul purpose of bringing us closer to Her. Pray for the desire to understand this truth. Pray for the desire to choose the “right” attitude. And with the “right” attitude, choose to use your will positively.

Choose to expand you heart when you feel your heart contract because you think someone hurt you. Thoughts come and go like the wind. How we choose to respond to thoughts is up to us. The Masters say most of us react to thoughts instead of responding appropriately to thoughts. Choose to respond to negative thoughts and negative emotions by remembering that this life is God’s play. We’re all just actors playing our parts. Sometimes we get to play a good guy and sometimes we get to play a bad guy. No matter what the part, play the part, “with the attitude of a Divine Being,” as Master states. Then you know you have chosen the “right” attitude. Choose to love unconditionally. This is so easy to say but at times difficult to do but choose to do so anyway. Choose to be even minded and cheerful under all circumstances.

And most important, choose to love God with all of your mind, your heart, and your strength. Then, sit quietly and allow yourself to feel God’s blessings flow through you like a river, at the same time watching the hurt, pain and sorrows dissolve away from your being like sugar dissolves in water. And pray for those who hurt you. Bless them and forgive them for they may not know what they do. And remember the “right” attitude is to choose to focus on God and God alone. Then you will feel God’s love, bliss and joy within and without.

Joy to you,

Nayaswami Gopal