Did I Contact My Departed Brother or Was it My Subconscious?


I lost my brother aged 37 less than 2 years ago unexpectedly. A few times, I and my mother saw him in lucid dreams, wherein, we asked him several questions, all of which he answered, although not all we could remember on waking. However, we both got a feeling that he is not super happy in his new world, if there exists any, contrary to the common belief that after life is better than Earth life. My question is 'Was it really him we talked to or just our mind seeing what our subconscious holds'?

—AL, India


Dear Friend,

You bring up several important points about life after “life” (in a human body). Let’s take a look one at a time:

1. Did you actually make contact or was your experience a product of subconscious dream state? The fact that you remember at least some of the dream carries some of the weight of a real contact. Yet the fact that you can’t remember all of it lessens the reality of that contact, at least somewhat. I suggest that you simply accept your contact with him as real, as a gift, even if you also understand that it may not convey everything about your brother. Just as when he was living, a conversation with him might be very deep; might be frivolous; might be a passing emotion brought on by circumstances that later change. So, take it, as we say here, “with a grain of salt!” ok?

2. You are quite right to say “contrary to the common belief” that the after-death state is a better one. Though the masters reject the concept of everlasting hell, there does exist both hell on earth (just read the newspapers or look around you) AND hellish states of consciousness in the astral world. In between, then, is obviously unhappy states. Depending on what caused your brother’s death, he could be confused; he could be angry; in despair; desirous of returning to a human body. So yes, you are quite right: it is VERY possible to be unhappy in the after-death state. What was he like while alive in a human body? Was he a happy person, generally? You see: what we “are” we take with us into the astral world. Our state of consciousness in a human body is confined by the walls of flesh and by the demands of daily life. But once freed from the prison of flesh, our consciousness expands and feels far more deeply than we could in human form. We don’t have to waste time working, eating, sleeping, etc. Those who lived as angry persons on earth go to the hell of anger in the astral world; those who are content, happy and joyful, go to that place. All such places are short-term pending our reincarnation according to our past actions and karma. Nothing but union with God (moksha) is eternal.

Lastly, it is a universal practice and teaching that we can help those who have “died” by our thoughts and prayers. One of the reasons for this is because in that after-death state of the astral world, most souls are relatively helpless to help themselves. Bereft of the human body, brain, nervous system and senses, only those highly sensitized to the world of deep feeling and consciousness can remain conscious up there. Most have momentary glimpses of the astral world, meetings with other astral family or friends, past life review and all of that sort of thing “commonly believed.” But truth is, most, like a fish out of water, cannot maintain consciousness in the oxygen-less and human body-less subtle environment of the astral world. They fall asleep; dream; or go beyond dreaming until it is time to wake up and reincarnate.

So if your brother is possibly unhappy, pray for him each day. Comfort him from your heart and through the spiritual eye at the end of your daily meditations. DO NOT BE ATTACHED, however, or you will NOT help him. Send him love without expectation, desire, grief, or attachment. That is very important. You are separated only for a little while. Earth time is nothing. Time itself doesn’t exist. He is as much with you now, indeed more so, because you don’t need his physical form to feel his presence and to recollect by memory, his image etc. and your love for him.

I hope these thoughts will be helpful and encouraging to you.

Blessings and joy forever yours,
Nayaswami Hriman
Seattle WA USA