I meditate regularly and practise to stay mindful throughout the day. However, lately, for the past 2 months, I have been troubled by an increase of vivid dreams. Some days I remember them, some days i don’t. I can’t get back to sleep, as the body pains in the morning. I even cry in these dreams, as I got to know this from my wife. Yesterday a tremendous urge to witness the dreams arose. I kept telling myself, let these dreams happen. Just let me witness them. It was exhausting to do so, and i gave up. Please help.
My understanding is that you are trying to witness your disconcerting dreams because in this way you can learn how to understand them, to handle them, to control them.
But maybe this is not the way to go. You might end up being even more tense and “exhausted,” as you call it.
To me it seems that your meditation and your trying to be mindful are enhanced your sensitivity. Are you quite a sensitive person by nature? These strong dreams come as a result of unprocessed impressions from your daily life. You might absorb things like a sponge and at night they come out, even to the point of making your body hurt.
If what I say sounds true, you need to protect yourself as much as you can. Very sensitive people need to spend a good amount of time by themselves, otherwise it all becomes too much. Also avoid outer disharmonious situations as much as you can. Choose your music, movies, and books very carefully. Only calm and harmonious influences are good.
Try this strategy: in the morning meditate and create your own harmonious energy. Then, when you step out into your work-world, don’t be “mindful” in the sense of receptive. Rather send out your harmonious energy to the environment, all the time. This practice will act as a protective shield.
Relax the body a lot during the day. Your nightly pain might come from unconscious tension throughout the day. Maybe some gentle yoga postures would help you.
Every now and then during the day take a few deep breaths from the diaphragm, which is highly calming.
And surround yourself with calm harmonious people as much as you can.
Eat lightly in the evening if you can.
I believe if you do all that, your “vivid dreams” and their results will disappear. They are telling you to change something in your life that is too much. And you can change it.
I hope this helps. May God bless you, pray to Him,