Please guide for how to stay in sakshi. as confused with silence and Atma. Should I stay in subtle soul and watch everything happening its own, or stay in stillness or silence while working my daily job? Still cannot stay for long in "Sakshi", just 1 or 2 minutes. (Forgive me for if you find ego in this letter please). Other hand, searching for a bride too at age 48 as mother is old (73) feeling loneliness and she need help with daily work.
—naveen masih, India
As Krishna teaches us in the Gita, we cannot achieve the actionless state without acting. The very fact of our physical bodies forces us to care for the body; to take a job; to eat; to bathe; to care for others to whom we are obligated.
It is natural for one who is seeking God and moksha to feel that one’s daily job and family duties are a hindrance to our spiritual efforts and consciousness. But, in fact, and in terms of karma and dharma, our duties ARE our path to freedom. Nishkam karma! ACT WITHOUT DESIRE for the FRUITS OF ACTION, Krishna tells us. We must fulfil our karma and God-given duties with even-mindedness, cheerfulness, and God remembrance.
Whether meditating or working, we should strive to feel God’s presence within ourselves and in the forms of all others, in the circumstances and challenges of our work and family.
Paramhansa Yogananda put it this way: when you are with people, BE WITH PEOPLE; when you are alone, withdraw into the Self. Come down from the Self to be active but remain always somewhat apart even when with others and active. A free soul who has achieved nirbikalpa samadhi never loses touch with the free state of the soul even in the midst of activity.
So the first step is to begin to dissolve the barrier in your mind that judges outward activity as UNspiritual and states of meditation as SPIRITUAL. Yes, of course there’s some truth in this but if we affirm it we will remain a “house divided against itself.”
When, therefore, you have time to meditate: go deep but meditate with devotion, yagya, self-offering. Do not expect results and do not judge your meditation by results. Meditate to please God and to offer to God (Divine Mother, guru, etc) your love: nothing else but your self is the only offering pleasing to God. Whether a good meditation or not so good, does not matter: “I am yours, be Thou ever mine!”
As for finding a life companion for you and finding help for your mother, you, of course, know that there are many ways to search and find a satisfactory wife in society. More importantly, however, you should pray that God’s will be done for the comfort and benefit of you and your mother. After all, care for your mother could come from a neighbor or friend. Friendship can come to you in other ways, as well. After sitting in meditation and before arising for activity, pray to God (Krishna, Divine Mother, etc) and express your needs; then say, “Let Thy will be done!”
Keep in mind you might find a wife who turns out to be lazy or greedy and not a friend to you nor a help to your mother. It is important therefore to pray that whatever happens may it be of a spiritual benefit and spiritually right FIRST! It is too easy to make a terrible mistake in the choice of a life partner! One must be cautious, more so at age 48!
You must also think of the needs of a partner, too, and how willing you are to serve her and not just be served! A true marriage is one of mutual respect and mutual service to one another. You must therefore not just think of what you and your mother need but what you are willing to offer in friendship and service to the woman who would be your wife. Otherwise, you might as well hire a servant.
May your life be blessed with wisdom, friendship, and true love!
Seattle WA USA