My relationships are worse. I have been a very loyal and faithful person my entire life. But all I've gotten is betrayal or hatred. People just don't like me. They talk behind my back. Now i have no faith in friendships. And even I don't have good relations with my family also. I don't like them. Sometimes I wanted to die. I even faced a very bad phase in which I decided to kill myself, but God saved me and I realised He loves me. But now I feel my heart is closed. I'm changed now. Help!
I am sorry to hear these obstacles you face. Make sure you talk to someone, maybe a trusted teacher or adult that will understand what you are going through. You can look for an Ananda Center in India on the website www.ananda.org near you and begin reaching out to someone there. Since you have felt God’s love and presence in your life before try to reconstruct that same feeling now and as often as possible. Ask for God’s guidance to find a way to regain your happiness and trust for people. Do not dwell on the past hurts. Today is a new chance to love and give love. This will take much willpower to focus on only good and joyful events in your life. Use those thoughts to crowd out the negative thoughts. You will see that you magnetize people around you to treat you differently. Try to always smile. Even if you feel that you have no reason to smile. Smile anyway. People are attracted to someone who is happy. Or even seems to be happy. Eventually you will become a friend and have friends. Please read How to be Happy all the Time: The Wisdom of Yogananda it is a great resource. Many blessings in your efforts. God Bless You.