How to Choose a Life Partner From the Spiritual Standpoint?


How to choose a life partner (a man) according to the Bhagvad Gita? What are the parameters that we need to check when choosing a boy?

—Anu, India


Dear Anu,

The Bhagavad Gita teaches us to dedicate our life to God, to serve Him, to love Him, to meditate, to fight for spiritual growth. That is the central message.

Therefore, the man you choose should help you on that journey to God. He should be a devotee too. He might be on another path, that is alright, but should be dedicate to the Divine. He should respect your spiritual side deeply.

Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita talks about the castes. Castes, in Yogananda’s understanding, are not a social status, but a state of consciousness. The highest state is brahmin, the God-seeker. You are, as far as I can tell, of that caste (of consciousness). You should therefore marry someone of the same caste: again, not socially speaking, but one who too is a brahmin, a God-seeker.

Krishna tells you in the Bhagavad Gita (1.43 and 18.42):

“By such wrong doings, those who disrupt the family, and create an admixture of the castes, the age-old sense of personal reality will be destroyed.”

“The inherent duties of a Brahmin (the highest caste) are mind control (concentration), sense control (by the practice of pranayama), self-restraint, purity, forgiveness, integrity, wisdom, meditation to attain Self-realization, and faith in a higher truth.

May you therefore find a boy who will share with you the path to God. That upward path is the true purpose of life.

All the best,